Quarantine Diary

QUARANTINE DIARY Day 1: I have stocked up on enough non-perishable food and supplies to last me for months, maybe years, so that I can remain in isolation for as long as it takes to see out this pandemic Day 1 + 45 minutes: I am in the supermarket because I wanted a Twix — […]

Alien Attack

I need to check back on this wisdom in the future. This makes me realize that if america was attacked by aliens, our first response would be to lower interest rates — Michael Nguyen (@nicepantsdude) March 17, 2020

“This guy’s a fucking idiot.”

Classic. I attended a Zoom meeting of doctors who, as a subculture, is not used to technology (we are the “Reply All” crowd), nor understands the “MUTE” function. Some guy in the middle of the meeting says, “This guy’s a fucking idiot.” And that ended the meeting. — Wayne (@Toaster_Pastry) March 21, 2020

Blowing it out of Proportion

In global disaster movies, there’s always a scientist who’s like, WE HAVE TO ACT NOW OR PEOPLE WILL DIE and some government guy who’s like, YOU’RE BLOWING THIS OUT OF PROPORTION and I’m like, NO ONE WOULD REACT TO INFO LIKE THAT IN REAL LIFE. My apologies to those movies. — DL (@davelozo) March 12, […]

Brilliant Kids

They don’t need to do any homework, considering their current level of intelligence. In locked down Wuhan, teachers use an app called DingTalk to set homework. Kids realised if it got enough one-star reviews it would be removed from App Store. Thousands of reviews flooded in, and DingTalk’s rating fell from 4.9 to 1.4 overnight. […]