The Truth About Cupcakes

Just told my colleagues that mini cupcakes offend me because cupcakes themselves are already a miniaturized version of cakes, and everyone knows that you shouldn’t miniaturize a miniature, and the room suddenly fell silent, until someone told me to tweet it; so here we are — Max Abelson (@maxabelson) August 9, 2019

Oh, The Irony

TRUMP: If you criticize America you should leave forever GOP: yeah don’t you dare criticize America! TRUMP: anyway here’s a list of US cities that are garbage — Jake Maccoby (@jdmaccoby) July 29, 2019

Whiskey, Uranium, and a Rattlesnake

Sometimes I wonder why I do this. But then, in a single news cycle, a couple gets arrested for driving around with whiskey, uranium, and a rattlesnake. The door flies off an armored truck. And a bunch of pig guts get dumped on a highway. — A Crime a Day (@CrimeADay) July 12, 2019